Based in Downtown Bentonville, Arkansas, Mike currently serves as the Chief Executive Officer at Pure Charity, a nonprofit dedicated to building world class technology solutions for Nonprofit Organizations, individuals, and Community Advocacy.

11 Jobs for the End of the World

The end of the world is near! ...or people just have a wild fascination with what will remain once it's all over.

Either way it's something that people sure spend a lot of time thinking about.

Did you know that over the past 10 years there have been more end-of-world movies & TV shows produced than in the 100 years before (source).

And if the truth be told, I'm not one to be a bystander in this fascination.  Off the record, I'm a big fan of The Walking Dead and World War Z was pretty awesome.  However, Zombieland may be the best.

The more I've watched these apocalyptic themed shows,the more I've noticed a common theme.

Have you noticed that everyone in these movies seems to fall into one of the following skills/jobs?

  • Welder
  • Mechanic
  • Gunsmith
  • Really smart person / Scientist
  • Really evil person
  • Hunter
  • Soldier
  • Bootlegger
  • Doctor
  • Religious person
  • Innocent Bystander

This is a bit disturbing and leaves me with some very serious questions.

What happened to all the lawyers, computer programmers, mid-level sales managers, marketing executives, stock brokers, accountants, and politicians?

Seriously, where did they go? Did they simple turn into Zombie food?

If they did, we have a few things to consider as we prepare for the end.

  1. Everyone should know how to fix something. You get special preference if it involves metal, engines, guns, traps, high walls, or helicopters.
  2. Whether you're a 2nd Amendment supporter or not, guns seem to be part of the end times culture. This is where having a soldier or hunter around is helpful.
  3. If you're not a scientist or a doctor, you had better have a friend who is. Always offer to carry their bags or do basic chores for them. If your doctor friend knows how to cure diseases or make vaccines, find another doctor friend because those kinds of doctors are always the last ones left (all their friends become the thing that's lets them escape).
  4. The really evil person always ends up on the losing side, so if you're a really evil person…just stop.
  5. No one uses straws. Stop using straws now & you can pretend like you're in training.
  6. Learn how to ride a horse or a motorcycle. These modes of transportation always seem to be available, so be ready (guys...this is perfectly good excuse to use if your spouse won't let you have a motorcycle).
  7. Be a flexible vegetarian. It's fine for now, but the end of world seems to be ruled by carnivores.  Just saying.
  8. Don't skip too much church because you'll have a lot of time with the religious person of the group. It will come up eventually so just stay ahead of the curve while you can.
  9. Everyone needs something to take the edge off because the end times can be stressful.  There is a lot of running in these movies so exercise may be enough (but if not, that's where the bootlegger comes in).
  10. Harmonicas, learn to play one. They always seem to be in old westerns and I predict they'll make a come back. If you're not one of the skilled people at the end of times, maybe they'll keep you around for the harmonica. No shame in that.
  11. Don't be an innocent bystander…enough said.
  12. If you have friends who are lawyers, be extra kind to them and invest a little more in that relationship. Unfortunately, you just have to expect them to go first.

Except for #2 (& maybe #10), it's funny how some of these same things are true today.

  1. Be an expert in something.
  2. Be helpful.
  3. Don't be mean.
  4. Bring some joy.
  5. Don't stand around (be productive).
  6. Be flexible.

That's enough for today, we'll get back to serious next week. Assuming there is a next week. :-)

p.s. here is a link to learn how to be a welder.

Of sinew and stones

let me make an introduction.